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| Romeo in his zen-mind |
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| The Olson family dog after eating a half pan of something Erika baked....not for him! |
The Difference between Me and Cesar Millan, The Dog
Whisperer
If you are a fan of Cesar Millan, The Dog Whisperer, you
know that while he is world-famous as a dog trainer, he is actually a boundary
teacher. He actually uses the word “boundary” on his website more than I use it
on mine. If you don’t believe me, check out www.cesarsway.com.
I love watching Cesar’s show. I never tire of watching him
teach boundaries to humans, again and again. Teaching boundary skills is so
darn rewarding because like Cesar, I see results immediately. Like Cesar, I empower humans
to achieve balance in their lives.
Of course, teaching boundaries to humans interacting with
dogs is different from teaching humans how to use boundaries with other humans.
#1- Dogs go into a calm, submissive state when you set
boundaries with them appropriately. Unfortunately, humans do not. In fact, when
you set boundaries with humans, sometimes they have a fit. The emotional storm
can vary in intensity. No need to stand there and watch the storm! However, it
is essential that you not allow your boundaries to be manipulated or moved
based on emotions.
#2- No leash. Sorry, I don’t have any kind of leash to give
you to when you set boundaries with a human. But in a three-hour workshop, I
can equip you with every skill you will need to set boundaries effectively with
people.
#3-I don’t recommend giving humans a hug right after you set
a boundary with them. Try giving a hug to a teenager right after you said No to
something and you’ll find out what I mean. Humans get confused and think you’re
apologizing for having a boundary. They imagine that you don’t really intend to
stick to your boundary.
#4- While you may have one dog or several dogs, most of us have
lots and lots of human relationships.
It’s very stressful to have a dog that is out of control. The
same is true when we don’t use our boundaries to manage relationships with
other people. The stress can be overwhelming. But, when you are ready, you can
find balance. When you learn the techniques and use the tools, you will feel
relief.
Did
you visit Cesar’s site? Were you surprised to see success stories about
parenting and overcoming disabilities? It can be hard to see all the invisible ways that boundaries are at work
in our lives and in our jobs. Learning how to use your boundaries to take care
of you in any demanding situation will change your life for the better.
Are you ready to learn more? Come to a workshop. We use my book,
Transform Your Boundaries, and I walk you through this process.
Upcoming Open Workshops:
This workshop is approved for continuing education credits
for social workers, marriage and family therapists, and mental health
counselors.
CEUs have just been granted for Oregon… see you there soon.
